Pissy Fucking Mood

Let me start by saying, this is not directed at anyone in particular, but I am in a pissy fucking mood and I need to vent some how.

I feel about ready to blow the fuck up and unleash all this pent up hurt, and anger! 

However, I am me, so I will not. I will keep my big fucking mouth shut, and pretend everything is okay. 

IT ISN"T OKAY! NOTHING IS FUCKING OKAY!!!!!!! NOTHING!!!!!!!

I cannot continue to fake being strong, and that things aren't getting to me.

I cannot be the rock all the time. 

I need to fucking cry, and question, and be held, and just let my emotions go. 

I have held them in so long that at this point I think most people think I am a fucking emotionless robot. Sure I guess I show some on a regular basis, such as happiness, and joy, but the bad ones stay locked up and I CAN"T FUCKING HOLD THEM IN ANYMORE!

FUCK 

I hate this, and right now the only way I can vent is by writing on the stupid fucking blog that I don't even give a damn about, and most of my fucking readers don't even speak English, and wouldn't know me if they tripped over me and visa versa. I just need to write this and try to get it out of my mind and out of the prison I keep all of these emotions in. 

Even if I did start to talk about them, NOBODY WOULD FUCKING LISTEN! 

I am the sounding board, and never have one when I need one! 

I need a fucking shoulder to fall apart on. But, no that makes me selfish doesn't it?

Fuck this, I don't even know what the fuck I am saying other than nobody gives a shit, and I am pissed the fuck off at fucking everything!